“Always assume that people love you,” said the Lord to me as we walked across the pasture, stepping carefully to not fall prey to the uneven ground trying to catch me off balance.  “Always start from there.”

It comes to mind that I have most always approached new situations and new people timidly … anticipating that they may not like me or we may not connect, and that I may not fit in. I hold back in a wait- and- see posture.  Well, I can tell you that will pretty much guarantee you won’t fit in.  Interesting, huh?  Wait- and- see leaves you hanging on the sidelines or trailing behind.

So I listen to what the Lord is saying to me.  “Assume everyone loves me.  That feels rather arrogant, Lord.”

“Not really. I love you, and if I love you how can anyone else not?  Park the arrogance there,” he says.  “Let me be the arrogant one, if you will.  I am confident enough and know you enough to say that this is the belief from which you should approach life.  Everybody loves Cathay.”

That’s a simple thought, and I’m stumped to find reason to debate it.  What if it really is that simple? And really, why should I start any new situation or relationship with believing otherwise? . . . other than that the very thought of it leaves me twisting inside, as if a rodeo cowboy has lassoed my intestines with a laureate rope and is gently tugging at them – tugging me out of my comfort zone.  Assuming that everybody loves me has never been my base self-concept.

“You have to take it on faith,” the Lord says, interrupting my internal monologue. “Just assume it because I told you to.  It’s not about whether it’s true or not. It’s only about what you believe. I’m telling you to believe this.”

I slowly commit that I am willing to do that. I wonder where or with whom I can try it out, and then bingo!  I got it!  I’m going to a conference next week where I will have opportunity to meets lots and lots of people I don’t know.  I suspect that would be a good place to do this homework, to just meet people and assume they all just absolutely love me.

Oh God . . . That scares the hell out of me.  Makes me feel a bit queasy.  Seriously?  Oh my . . .

The Follow Up:

I didn’t even have to wait until the Atlanta conference to practice assuming everyone loves me.  The very next day I had an appointment with my hairdresser, someone I had only met one time previously.  Going in the attitude that assumes everyone loves me, we had a great time!  Wonderful conversation and I left feeling really good (plus my hair looked terrific!)

Later that week, at the conference I sat at a breakfast table and really enjoyed talking to a number of people — the woman who broke her leg on a cruise and could do nothing but hang out at the soap making demonstrations and got hooked, the couple who raise goats and have too much milk. They’ve made a lot of cheese with it, but still have lots of milk left so they’re going for milk soap products.  And a few other kind women with less memorable stories. I felt very comfortable with them, and I think they all liked me 🙂

At lunch time, at another table, we were given questions to answer about our businesses.  I wasn’t so comfortable — just not much to share about my experience in this new venture and I kind of withdrew and didn’t feel the love.  In fact, the woman next to me rather rudely ignored me. Maybe it’s because I approached the table feeling less than loveable.

The lesson came through loud and clear. If you approach people assuming they love you, you can love them easily.  That simple.  If you don’t think they love you, then your energies (and vibrations) go into protecting yourself, or trying to be likeable, and just trying too hard. That sends mixed messages and makes people feel put off.

And how does that lesson expand?  If you come to God/Christ/Holy Spirit believing they absolutely love and adore you, you can be free and honest and respond with total love and openness with them.  If you approach in guilt, shame and feeling less than loved, you won’t be able to easily receive or return the love.  Your energies will be tied up in hiding and creating stories and excuses.  God won’t feel put off, but you will assume God is put off.

So if we’re going to make assumptions, isn’t it just better to assume that God — and everybody — loves you?